dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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