Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
