I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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