Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize