That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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