if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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