Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
