After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
