This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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