I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
