She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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