carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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