Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
then he tried to convert me to islam
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
