If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
COCAINE IS GR8
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
