You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
