Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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