no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
What a dumb baby whore.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize