this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
