Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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