I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
