make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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