i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Please don't give away my fajitas
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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