speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
