What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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