You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize