About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
