This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
