Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize