Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize
