I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize