but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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