I like to think it a success when the cops are called
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
