okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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