normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Randomize