I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
