I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
