So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
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