i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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