nut hugger
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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