Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
