"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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