I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He passed out mid-signature
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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