I don't think brook has ever known best
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
