Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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