He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
