um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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