Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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