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• (323): View more from California

  that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.

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• (516): View more from New York

  I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head

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• (619): View more from California

  Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.

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• (772): View more from Florida

  You took a bar mat shot.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever

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• (567): View more from Ohio

  Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted

  (1-609): View more from New Jersey

  no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.

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