Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
