3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
